Just 6 random tangents... because I have nothing else to discuss

1. I really think that Mr. Clean Magic erasers are made with real magic. I don't understand how two swipes with that thing, can do what bleach, or soap, or comet, or SOS pads can't. AND it isn't messy, AND it doesn't smell bad, AND it isn't really very hard to use. Very weird. And magical.

2. It is always odd / funny to me when people that I meet don't have extended family. "Oh, it is just me and my mom. That is how it has always been." Then what do you DO?? Who do you talk about??? I seriously have well over 100 first and second cousins, altogether. Marty's family is much smaller, but still not small. He has a brother, a sister, and two step sisters. And two sets of parents. (As do I.)

3. An Elizabethism: We were in the car yesterday, and she said, "Mom, can you please give Toppee (her stuffed dog, her lovey since she was a baby) a bath? His fur is getting rough."

I replied with, "It is getting RUFF!! Of course it is getting RUFF!!! He is a dog!! RUFF RUFF!!!"

She didn't even really laugh, just kind of half smiled and said, "Mom, that was actually kind of funny. You should have been a vegetarian."

*ba dum dum*

4. My land line telephone service provider offers voice mail instead of having to use an answering machine. I loved it at first, but now it is getting to be a pain in the ass, because: a) there is no blinky light to tell you that you have messages so I forget to check it, and when I remember there are usually 27 messages... 17 of which say, "I need you to call me RIGHT NOW."... and they were left 4 days ago. And b) the machine cuts off the first few seconds of most messages. Not generally a big deal, until you get messages like I got this morning (that was left on wednesday, btw) that say, "....ach Natalie. It is very important that you try to call Mrs. Daniels back as soon as possible." Who the hell is Mrs. Daniels? First, I try to remember what bills I am behind on, and whether I am behind enough that they would be calling me. Then I try to think of any other reason that a Mrs. Daniels would be calling me through another person, instead of calling me herself. Because of my positive outlook on life, (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! HA!!! HA!!!!) that generally leads to what I believe is called, "delusions of grandeur"... Then I convince myself that:

Mrs. Daniels is Oprah's booking agent, calling to invite me to her Favorite Things show.

or

Mrs. Daniels is from Extreme Makeover, they want to build me a house because... ummm... wait. I haven't done anything House Building Worthy. So maybe Mrs. Daniels is:

From What Not To Wear. That would be a little closer to the truth.

Or

She is from Jerry Springer... Marty is actually a male prostitute that has been sleeping with my mother and stepfather for money... but dressed as a woman.

Or

I won the camera from the photo contest that I entered... oh wait. I haven't entered yet.

For the record, she was a bill collector. *sigh*

5. I have a bad feeling I am never going to get out of this house. As in sell this house. I told Marty I wanted it to be on the market in one year, but it is just not going to happen. I am going to be ninety seven years old and still living in this damn too-small house. The thought makes my heart race. In a bad way.

6. I am home for the day with a sick Colby. Colby does not do "sick" well. And Elizabeth has an art show today. Yeah, I wanna get pregnant again. You betcha.